I love roller coaster rides!!! The safe ones, anyways. Not the traveling ones at the fair. The huge permanent ones at amusement parks. I’m not really sure why I like them, but I do.
I’m not a fan of heights or water or feeling like I’m going fall off a cliff or going so fast I can’t pull my head away from the headrest or worst of all, not being in control. A roller coaster is all of those things wrapped up into an exhilarating few minutes.
The excitement and anxiousness that builds as you wait in line to get on the ride. The inability to sit still once you’re in your seat and buckled in before the ride starts. The urge to giggle as the ride starts inching forward because you’re so nervous for what’s coming up ahead. Then there’s that first giant climb – it’s slow, sometimes painfully slow, the ground gets further beneath you. Now you get a little scared and you start to press back into your seat and maybe grip the bars next to or in front of you. Now you’re at the top and you know you’re going to take off, plummeting to ground. I’m pretty sure I have a look of sheer terror on my face at this moment, but it’s only for an instant. And then, the roller coaster takes off and you can’t help but yell out in fear, excitement, freedom, and joy! Next you hit the bottom and all the turns and twists start coming faster than you like, but you hang on for dear life and know it’ll all be over soon. As the ride comes to an end, your heart is pumping, you can finally breathe, but you realize it’s over and you’re a little sad because as terrifying as those moments were, the other moments were pure joy.
Being a foster parent is a lot like riding that roller coaster. The main difference would be that instead of the riding lasting only a few minutes, it lasts days, months, or years depending on the case. One thing is certain: there are mountains that build anticipation as you climb and create terror and joy as come down; there are twists and turns where you’re literally hanging on for dear life; you are 90% out of control of what’s going on; and no matter how it ends, there will be tears of sorrow and laughs of joy.
To be honest, it’s exhausting: mentally, physically, emotionally (especially), and spiritually. It’s work to stay on this roller coaster. Somedays it feels like the seatbelt failed, the roller coaster is stuck inverted at the top of a loop, and your hands are starting to slip.
So how do we hang on? How do we push through to get to the next moment of joy?
For me, it’s two things: 1. believing and having faith and 2. others that come alongside us and share in our burdens.
When I’m in one of those moments where I’m completely exhausted, questioning why we are doing this, and wanting to just let go and jump down off the stranded roller coaster car; I’m thankful in these moments that God has drawn me closer to Him, given me a desire to get to know Him, that I love Him. His word is written in my heart, and I believe His promises to me. My belief in who God is and that He loves me more than I could ever love Him breeds faith. Faith that God is there with me, my safety net if my hands did slip, that His plan for this child is being played out and He wants me to be a part of it. It’s not easy, and there are many moments and days where it feels like He’s not there and the safety net is gone. But then the sun changes in the sky and I see a glimmer of it’s rays hitting the net. He’s there. Always there!
We have an amazing support system and I’m so very thankful for each and everyone of them!! Each person in our “tribe” plays a different role in supporting us from buying clothes for the kids, bringing us a meal, handing down clothes for the kids, watching the kids for a few hours, being an ear for me to vent to, but most importantly, those who faithfully pray for us!!! It seriously brings me to tears thinking of all the people that I know that pray for us constantly!! Hear me when I say this: There is NO way we could stay on this roller coaster without these prayers!!!!
I’ll leave you with this today:
“Blessings multiplied and burdens divided.”
Sara Kerns
“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”
Galatians 6:2